Monday, March 7, 2011

Hope Springs

Every Spring since I can remember, my mom and I have been on the lookout for the first robin of the season. When that first robin is spotted, we write the date on our calendar and call each other with the good news. Usually, we see our first robin between March 3-12th. That first robin symbolizes hope. Hope of Spring. Hope of New Life. A glorious fresh start.

Around mid-February, I had experienced several disappointments, some small, one large. I was having trouble shaking that feeling of disappointment and I know that if you let disappointment sink into your soul, it quickly turns to bitterness and despair. I reflected on this quote:

The many contradictions in our lives - such as being home while feeling homeless, being busy while feeling bored, being popular while feeling lonely, being believers while feeling many doubts - can frustrate, irritate, and even discourage us. They make us feel that we are never fully present. Every door that opens for us makes us see how many more doors are closed. But there is another response. These same contradictions can bring us into touch with a deeper longing for the fulfillment of a desire that lives beneath all desires and that only God can satisfy. Contradictions, thus understood, create the friction that can help us move toward God.

Henri J. M. Nouwen
from "Bread for the Journey"

I needed God to remind of me of his grace, his very specific grace for me. I asked him to fill up the hurting areas of my heart with his love. And then I dared to ask him for a tangible sign of his love for me. I felt very conflicted asking for this because I do already know that he loves me and he has already shown me in so many beautiful ways. How could I dare ask for more?

A few minutes after praying this prayer, I ran out my back door and was off to my women's Bible study. As I stepped off the back stoop I was startled when 12 robins flew out of the nearby snow covered bushes! 12! robins! on February 15th!

God is interested in our healing. He never disappoints. He can teach is how to live fully in the face of life's disappointments. He even cares about our joy factor. He cares for us.

I Peter 5:7

"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you."

1 comment:

  1. I feel like I am getting to know you via your blog and thoroughly enjoy it. I tried to make a comment once but not sure it went through. Anyway I am from FBC California MO and my husband and I are in charge of the Burkina Faso missions through our church. I would love to visit with you about visiting us if that would be possible? I know you have visited some with Jean but wanted to nail down a possible date with you. my email is if you have a spare moment.
    God Bless and have a good week